Prussiaxhimself Someone Always knows Prologe
by TheTwistedEssie
Summary: Prussia is in denial that he loves himself, and everyone thinks that he does. He pretends to like France to prove that he does not love himself. Everyone reads each others diaries and find out interesting things. PruFra selfcest
1. Prologe

Why do people hate me so much? I didn't do anything to anyone. Everyone thinks I'm so narcissistic, arrogant, and selfish. Is it illegal to care about yourself these days? It sure seems like it. Anyway, for some weird reason people have this idea that I'm in love with myself and think I'm going to be "forever alone." How did they come up with that? Even if I did love myself that is no reason to talk bad about me or stop hanging out with me without warning. At least Spain, France, Denmark, and America are still friends with me. I will never admit this to anyone or even say it allowed, but I have no clue what I would do without them. I want to tell them, but I don't want them to think I'm pathetic. They probably already go the hint when everyone started to hate on me. Well except for Spain. I tried to do that solitude shit for a week, but France and Spain took me out of it because apparently I was acting weird. How did Japan do that for a year? I guess I'm too awesome to be by myself. I need to rub my awesomeness on other people, that's why I go crazy when I'm alone for too long. Those people who hate me get to miss out on my awesomeness.

I heard someone running up the stairs, so I closed my diary and slid it under my bed. Don't worry, I don't really keep it there. That's just where I put it for emergencies.

Spain burst open to door,"Dinner's ready!"

"I hope you didn't make it."

He smiled,"No, France did."

"Good." I stood up and followed Spain into the kitchen.

I forgot to tell you,"France and Spain live with me, so we wont have to spend so much of our money on a house. I wish I could take credit for this awesome idea, but it was America who suggested it to us when Spain complained about not being able to buy lot's of tomatoes. I swear Romano and tomatoes are the only things he really cares about.

The worst thing about France's cooking is that he make us eat an appetizer, and today we had to have to most unoriginal appetizer you could think of. I really hope that Spain isn't the only one who can't guess it. you know what, I'm not even going to tell you. I put some ranch stuff on mine, and ate it with a fork. Spain just picked all the tomatoes out of it and didn't even eat the rest of it. When France came into the dinning room I asked him a question.

"Why can't we just eat like normal people?" I wined.

"But if we ate like normal people, you wouldn't be awesome, no?"

I sighed,"Well I don't care about being awesome in the food department. No one really cares about what you eat anyway."

"People do care. If people didn't zhen zhey wouldn't care if America ate too much."

Spain ate his last tomato and smiled,"He has a point."

I laughed,"Okay let's just carry on with dinner."

So we ate the main course and then ate desert.

This was the last time that I didn't have to suffer the consequences of that stupid decision.

—-

I thought the first one sucked, so I'm redoing it.


	2. Mirror

I looked at myself in the mirror and just admired myself. I am not afraid to tell people that I am sexy. Other people like Canada seem to have some fear about that. I had just right amount of muscles to be strong, but not too much to freak people out. Everyone reminds me that I have an awesome smirk. Well they usually tell me that it's charming, cute or handsome, but that basically means the same thing. I also am awesome enough to have unique color of hair. I must be destined for awesomeness.

France opened the door to my room. "So, you're checking yourself out instead of making breakfast?"

I turned around,"What? I'm not checking myself out I'm just looking in the mirror."

France chuckled,"One must look in the mirror to check themselves out."

I shook my head,"No, you can look at yourself without a mirror. Why else would people masterbate if they couldn't see thirself?"

"Are you saying that a blind person can't have sex?"

"What!? How is that even related to what I just said?"

France twirled his hair,"I'm saying a blind person can masterbate."

"You're not making any sense."

"Neither are you."

"I'm too awesome to make sense."

France had a mischievous look on his face,"Are you in love with yourself?"

Now that was a hilarious question,"No, that's impossible."

"No it is not."

I laughed," And how would you know that?"

"Because I've read about it," France replied.

"On the internet?"

"Yes."

"And you believe it?" I questioned.

"Yes, the explanation made perfect sense. If you can love other people romantically, why not yourself?"

"What if a troll made that site?"

"It was a dating website," France clarified.

"That's even more likely to be made by a troll," I warned.

"The layout was beautiful. If it was made by a troll then they must have a lot of time."

"Trolls have no lives."

"Well the point is that it's not impossible for you to be in love with yourself," France said.

"I'm too awesome to love myself."

"If you're as awesome as you say you are then I'm sure you would love yourself."

Be prepared for short chapters


	3. World Meeting

At the world meeting

The meeting was supposed to start at 6:00, but only a few people actually came on time. So the meeting officially started at 6:30.

Germany stood up, "Today we will stay on task."

America laughed, "Task my ass!"

Germany sighed, "So is there anything we should discuss today?"

I stood up,"I'm awesome!"

Germany face palmed,"Something important!"

"I made a white flag for everyone," Italy said as he gave one to the people around him.

"I sold a shovel for $100," Netherlands added.

"What?! That's too expensive! Buying something like that is a bad money burn you know," Switzerland complained.

"That's why I didn't buy it, I sold it," He explained.

Germany kept trying to get everyone to cooperate, but he failed. Halfway through the meting almost everyone got up from the table and started to talk with their friends.

I had my diary in my lap and I wrote down the most interesting conversations. One page was dedicated to Spain and Romano's daily conversation since for some reason I had not gotten around to writing about that. Another page told how the girls were trying to creep out Sweden by being all touchy with him. Then I heard a name which took my attention away from everyone else. It's obviously the most awesome name: Prussia.

Hungary, England, and Turkey were talking about me. I scooted towards them so I would hear what they were saying word for word.

"Hey, do any of you ever feel like Prussia is secretly in love with himself?" Hungary whispered.

"Hmm, that seems like a possibility, why?" England replied.

Hungary shrugged, "Lichtenstein has some idea that he is madly in love with himself."

"Well he wont shut up about being awesome, so maybe that's his way to show it without anyone knowing," He suggested.

"I would laugh if that was true, but no one would believe us since we have no proof," Turkey pointed out.

Hungary took out her phone from her pocket,"We can get some proof tonight."

"I'm going! That would be hilarious!" Turkey said.

Hungary gave England a look of inclusion. When he got the hint he said, "Okay I'll go too."

I paused. Were they really going to sneak into my house in the middle of the night? Neither of them said anything about telling anyone, so why would they need proof. I hope I didn't miss something important. Uhh, this meeting is unawesome. I need to get them to know that I am not attracted to myself. Well they're definitely not going to find me masturbating tonight.


End file.
